Why Can't I Stop OCD Compulsions?: Understanding Rigidity in OCD
Photo by Hirzul Maulana on Unsplash
Why do OCD compulsions feel impossible to stop, even when you know they're excessive? If you've tried to resist checking, washing, or seeking reassurance and failed spectacularly, you're experiencing psychological rigidity—the core mechanism that makes OCD compulsions different from ordinary habits. Understanding why compulsions are so hard to stop, and how Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) therapy targets this rigidity, is essential for effective OCD recovery.
This article explains the emotion regulation research behind OCD's compulsive patterns and why willpower alone rarely works.
If you've experienced OCD, you know this frustration: you understand intellectually that checking the door 13 times is excessive. You recognize that seeking reassurance doesn't actually help. You know avoiding situations shrinks your world. You've also heard that stopping compulsions is the key to overcoming OCD. You know this, but you can't stop. You do it anyway, again and again, with mechanical precision. It's endless and exhausting.
Why does it seem impossible?
The answer lies in the rules of emotion regulation and what this looks like in OCD: relentless psychological rigidity. Understanding this, and how treatments like Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) target it, is key to effective recovery.
Why Do OCD Compulsions Keep Happening?
Emotion regulation is anything you do (or don’t do) to change the way you feel. It can be helpful (adaptive) or unhelpful (maladaptive). In OCD, compulsions are an attempt to regulate emotion—your anxiety is spiking and you want to feel better. Case closed, right? Except compulsions are maladaptive: key feature being you feel better now, but feel worse later. They feed the OCD beast.
But that's not the only problem. Another important feature of maladaptive emotion regulation is rigidity. Research on emotion regulation in anxiety and mood disorders reveals something critical: what makes a coping strategy harmful isn't necessarily the strategy itself, it’s the rigid way it gets applied.
Think about it: seeking reassurance can be healthy, like asking your doctor about symptoms. Avoiding situations can be adaptive; skipping a toxic work event makes sense. Checking can be reasonable when you're making sure you locked your car in a parking lot. In each case there's an emotional component (likely anxiety) and an adaptive response. None of these strategies are inherently problematic. Take action, regulate anxiety, adapt to situation.
The problem emerges when these become automatic, context-blind responses that persist regardless of whether they're working. According to emotion regulation researchers: "The inflexible application of emotion regulation strategies has a greater impact on effectiveness than the strategies themselves."
Why Are OCD Compulsions So Hard to Stop?
Everyone experiences rigid patterns when they're struggling. Worry loops regardless of whether you're at work or trying to relax. Rumination doesn't care about your schedule. Anxiety shows up whether you want it to or not. Rigidity in emotion regulation isn't unique to OCD, it’s part of psychological distress across the board.
But compulsions have a specific quality that makes them uniquely stubborn: they demand behavioral execution according to internal rules, often divorced from reality. This is OCD’s non-negotiable: the feeling that you can't just interrupt a compulsion mid-course. The experience of your brain “not letting you.” The urgency that says it has to be completed, and "completed" means done in exactly the right way, the right number of times, with the right level of attention, until it feels right. Which might be never.
And if you have generalized anxiety along with OCD (statistically there’s a good chance), this rigidity does not discriminate. In clients I work with, I frequently see compulsions hijack garden-variety worries that have nothing to do with intrusive thoughts. Feeling anxious about your job? Out comes the hand sanitizer. Uncertain feelings in a relationship? Check the stove and locks again. Stressed about an upcoming family function? Reorder the items on the desk to perfection. The compulsion system is equal opportunity: any spike in discomfort can activate the same rigid behavioral response, even when there's no logical connection between the worry and the ritual.
What is the OCD Cycle?
Here's what happens in OCD:
Trigger occurs - You touch a doorknob, notice asymmetry, have an intrusive thought, or just feel anxious
Rigid response activates - Compulsion executes automatically
Brief relief - Temporary reduction in discomfort
Cycle strengthens - Your brain learns "this is the only way to handle this feeling"
No learning - The pattern persists even when it clearly doesn't work
There's no flexibility. No evaluation of whether the strategy makes sense in this context. No weighing costs versus benefits. No adaptation when it's not working. In those moments, compulsion is the only option.
What is Psychological Flexibility?
A grad school instructor once called psychological flexibility "the holy grail of mental health." I'm sure hardcore researchers would dispute the technicality of that phrase, but the core idea is right: this is what we're building in OCD treatment.
Remember those adaptive examples? Asking your doctor, skipping the toxic event, checking your car door? Psychological flexibility is what allows you to evaluate in the moment whether your response fits the situation. It's the ability to experience difficult thoughts and feelings without automatically reacting, to choose behaviors based on what matters to you rather than what OCD demands, and to adapt your response based on the actual situation.
Research shows this flexibility, not just anxiety reduction, is what separates adaptive from maladaptive emotion regulation.
The flexible person can pause and ask: "Is this strategy actually working right now? Does it make sense in this context? Does it serve my long-term goals?”
OCD eliminates that pause. That space between trigger and compulsion. That's where treatment happens.
How Does ERP Therapy Build Flexibility in OCD?
Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) is the gold-standard treatment for OCD, and it works by directly targeting rigidity. The goal isn't primarily to reduce anxiety (though that often happens). It's to restore flexibility. To distinguish between trigger and compulsion and to widen the gap between them.
The process involves identifying what triggers lead to what compulsions, and then gradually practicing sitting with discomfort without engaging the compulsion. We're not trying to eliminate intrusive thoughts or uncomfortable sensations. We're building your capacity to have those experiences without automatically engaging the rigid response pattern.
Can you notice the urge to check and not check? Can you experience the "not just right" feeling and leave things imperfect anyway? Can you sit with contamination anxiety and recognize it's discomfort, not danger?
These aren't questions about whether you're anxious. They're about whether you can be flexible in the presence of that anxiety.
Real Examples: Rigidity vs. Flexibility
Contamination OCD
Rigid response: Touch doorknob → Must wash hands immediately → Wash for exactly 2 minutes → Still feels contaminated → Wash again → Repeat
Flexible response: Touch doorknob → Notice urge to wash → Evaluate: "Do I need to wash right now? What am I doing next? What matters more—perfect cleanliness or meeting my friend for coffee?" → Choose based on values
Symmetry OCD
Rigid response: Notice crooked picture → Must straighten → Doesn't feel right → Adjust again → Still not perfect → Continue until it feels "just right" (may take hours)
Flexible response: Notice crooked picture → Notice "not just right" feeling → Recognize this is the OCD pattern → Choose to leave it and continue with your day
Harm Obsessions
Rigid response: Intrusive thought about hurting someone → Must mentally review to prove you wouldn't do it → Thought returns → Review again → Need reassurance → Seek reassurance → Cycle continues
Flexible response: Intrusive thought appears → Recognize it's just a thought → Notice anxiety → Allow both to be present without needing to fix them → Continue with activity
Yes, all of these examples can be filed under “easier said than done.” Simple but not easy. And that’s where treatment comes in.
When to Seek Professional Help for OCD
Consider reaching out for treatment if:
Compulsions take more than 1 hour daily
You're avoiding situations because of OCD
Rituals are affecting work, relationships, or daily functioning
You feel like your mind is having it’s way with you
Previous attempts to "just stop" haven't worked
You've tried therapy before and it didn't help your OCD
The rigidity of OCD makes it extremely difficult to overcome alone. But with proper treatment, people can restore flexibility and reclaim their agency.
Getting Started with OCD Treatment
Effective OCD treatment focuses on restoring your capacity for flexible responding. It's hard work—some of the hardest psychological work there is—but it's possible.
Recovery begins in the shift from rigid reaction to flexible response. From compulsion to choice. From "I have to" to "I could, but I don't have to."
Ready to build psychological flexibility? I specialize in evidence-based OCD treatment using Exposure and Response Prevention therapy. Contact me to schedule a free 15-minute consultation.
About the Author: Kevin Jaworski is a licensed therapist (LPCC) specializing in OCD and anxiety disorders, providing telehealth therapy throughout Ohio—including Columbus, Cleveland, Cincinnati, Akron, Youngstown, Dayton, and Toledo. He uses evidence-based approaches including ERP, I-CBT, and ACT to help clients with emotion regulation and to break free from obsessive doubt and build tolerance for uncertainty. His practice focuses on clients whose previous therapy didn't address the specific mechanisms keeping OCD and anxiety patterns stuck.
Disclaimer: This article is for informational and educational purposes only. It does not constitute medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you're experiencing symptoms of OCD, anxiety, or other mental health concerns, please consult with a qualified mental health professional. The information provided here is not a substitute for professional clinical assessment and care. If you're experiencing a mental health emergency, please call 988 (Suicide & Crisis Lifeline) or go to your nearest emergency room.